Butt Stabbing

Here's the skinny on the meds that I have to take for my frozen cycle. First, the pros.

Less injections overall

Not every night until the last week before the transfer

That about does it.

Now, the cons.

Bigger needles

Intramuscular injections rather than subcutaneous

Thick medication = slower injection time = more time needle stays in

My upper tush is so sore that it hurts to walk. Poor G has to stab me every night, and while I try not to flinch, it's hard not to. Especially now when my injections are nightly and there's not time for my bruises to heal. Oh, that's right - bruises. They have me on baby aspirin, too - which apparently has just enough umph to give me the new superpower of "easily bruises."

The transfer is in 3 days - not sure what time yet. I am excited. The possibilities on the cusp - we're hoping for the best, clearly, but don't want to get ourselves all worked up. I will, however, get worked up about my butt bruise recovery. :) Hooray!

Checking It Out

This cycle is trickling along. I'm not sure if it's that I don't have to go in for monitoring every few days, or the every 3 day injection thing - but whatever the reason, this cycle feels soooo loooong.

Tomorrow is our monitoring appointment. If everything looks good (lining is thick, hormone levels are okay), then we are a-go for a transfer on the 3rd. So, 2 of our little baby embryos will be thawed and put back. I hope they enjoy the thawing process and have not been affected by the freeze process. If they show signs of damage, then they will simply thaw another in it's place. It only takes about 40 minutes for the thaw process. I have a feeling that the whole thing will go smoothly.

Here's to plump lining and good hormone levels. I am ready to be off of this delestrogen already!

On the Calendar

I woke up this morning with a to-do list - including "Call nurse about FET schedule." But, of course, our nurse beat me to the punch. When I came back in from walking the dog - there was a message waiting for me.

She stated that she was surprised I came in this weekend to start my FET cycle. Um... what did you think I meant last week when I said "Any day now!"? Well, anyways, she was able to fit me on the schedule for this cycle - which, as she said in the message, meant that we didn't have to cancel this cycle. Well, thanks. I guess.

I started taking the Delestrogen last night. It's an intramuscular shot that requires your love to jab you in the butt with a needle the size of a #2 pencil lead while you hold onto something for dear life. No side effects yet - but if I start pulling hair out and barking out orders like a mad woman, I'll be sure to let you know.

So, I continue my Delestrogen every 3 days until the 29th, when I go in for a mid line check (I assume this means they measure the uterine lining). Then I return on the 3rd of Feb. for the transfer.

It feels good to know that progress is again being made and that another try is upon us...

At the Start... Again.

About a month ago, G and I closed the door to the fertility scene to just sit back and enjoy the holidays, vacation, and each other. Well, yesterday we pried that door back open. Day three monitoring - bloodwork and ultrasound. It's odd how foreign the whole morning was to me - even after having been through months of it just a short while ago. No one forgets how to put those feet in stirrups (I mean, seriously, it's like riding a bike) - but the whole prick of the needle and waiting and filling out forms... I could have done that all with my eyes closed a short while ago. How quickly we forget...

So this time we are doing a Frozen Embryo Transfer (FET) cycle - since we have four frozen blastocysts in storage. From what I hear, this is like the vacations of all cycles. Minimal appointments, less injections, infrequent dates with the probe... sounds great. It did start with a bit of a hiccup though - my meds were just called in last week - six days before my appointment - and were due to be delivered on Friday for an injection start on Saturday. Well, they didn't arrive and apparently it was b/c the insurance company hadn't had enough time to process and approve said medications. So while the nurse said "It's a go!" in her adorable British accent - I was all "But..."

So, instead, today we drove up to the ONLY office open for non-monitoring appointments to sign some consent forms. They were also able to fill our prescription on the spot so that we could get this cycle started and not have to put it off for another month.

We paid out of pocket, but will likely be reimbursed from the pharmacy once the insurance kicks in.

So here's the plan: I start injections of Delestrogen (intramuscular) tonight, and will continue every three evenings for about a week and a half. Then they add in some progesterone which I will continue until the day of the transfer - which looks like it will land on the 25th or 26th of this month.

I call my nurse tomorrow to confirm the date of the transfer, and the progesterone start will begin about five days prior.

We'll keep you updated!

PS - the above shot prep materials are for the Delestrogen. I was amazed at the amount of needles we got with this one... eek.

Better Luck Next Time

So, the beta was negative. My doctor gave me the call today - during her lunch (how nice). She left a message that said "I was trying to catch you right after your students left and before my afternoon appointments!"

Of course we're bummed. But today was rough, with an increase in the amount of blood I was seeing and the anxiety... I was worried that if it was positive that there was something seriously wrong. I don't want the first moment of my pregnancy to be me panicking about some NOT-normal side effect. So on to the next plan.

I will be starting birth control at the end of the week, and will remain on that for about 5 weeks - to get us over the holiday hump. Then we'll start right back up with day 1 of that cycle. This time we are doing an FET - frozen embryo transfer. I have 4 frozen blastocysts, so they will thaw and transfer. I will update on that process as we near the time. It's only 3 doctor visits - (WHOA!) so I'm looking forward to this cycle for the simple reason that it's low maintenance. I will only have a total of 10 (or so) injections before the FET. Ah, the simple things...

For now I'm going to mourn our attempt for a moment and then enjoy the holidays with my wonderful husband and family. My body needs a break from all of these hormones! I'm thinking a nice glass of red wine will help my "detox." :)

Unappreciated Side Effects

1. The need to decorate for Christmas "way too early."

2. Bleeding. Apparently "normal" and also accompanied by "normal" cramps. I hope by normal the nurse meant "do not panic."

3. Moody. I'm thankful for a patient husband who has perfected the dive to the couch to get out of my way, and for his support in my habitual viewing of the movie Elf.

4. The need to nap at any given moment in the day.

5. The label as the Designated Driver. No matter what. No drinking. No soda. I am far from a regular drinker of adult beverages, but you notice such when attending a wedding. With an open bar. I'd like to have a glass of wine. Or 10. This is stressful.

6. By far the most excruciating (TMI warning for Mom M.). No sex. Nada. Zilch. By far the most challenging and the least appreciated side effect of this whole process. And it definitely doesn't help with #3.

Caffeinated Bites

Dear Diet Coke,

Oh how I miss you. You were such a wonderful companion, especially when chilled or on ice with a straw. You knew how to please a thirsty gal. I'm sorry that my sudden abandonment has left you on the shelves of the store instead of the cozy confines of my refridgerator. The doctor said "no soda or caffeine," and, dear friend, you are both. The doctor is keeping us apart. I hope that during this time we find new loves, mine being non-caffeinated and non-carbonated in variety.

Good luck, ol' pal.

Love,
Jenn

This weekend I helped host a baby shower for a friend from high school. I will share pictures in a future posting, but let me just tell you.... I have been decaffeinated now for at least a week. Yesterday, however, at the shower, there was this bowl. This glorious bowl. Shiny chocolate coated somethings. I popped one in, thinking it was a peanut inside and I'd be able to resist future impulse. Oh, no. No such luck. It was a soft pomegranate seed. Chocolate covered pomegranate. I think I popped what turned out to be the equivalent of a 6 pack of soda. For the first time I could ever remember, I was wired when I was trying to get to sleep. I was exhausted, but stuck in "awake" mode because of these delicious caffeinated bites of chocolate pomegranate.

Finally, right around the time my alarm clock went off - I fell fast asleep.

PS: 7 day countdown for the beta test. Start now.